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498a Discussion Forum - View topic - The concept of finding partners on matrimonial websites
It is currently Fri Sep 30, 2022 12:57 pm



Reply to topic  [ 14 posts ] 
The concept of finding partners on matrimonial websites 

How did you find your spouse (failed relationship only)?
I was blind in love and married against my parents' advice 10%  10%  [ 4 ]
I was blind in love but my parents did not object either 2%  2%  [ 1 ]
A common relative hooked me up 12%  12%  [ 5 ]
A friend/relative was the match-maker but our families did not know each-other 22%  22%  [ 9 ]
Got sucked into matrimonial ads hoping to find a "better" partner 54%  54%  [ 22 ]
Total votes : 41

The concept of finding partners on matrimonial websites 
Author Message

Joined: Fri May 25, 2012 9:43 pm
Posts: 282
I was just pondering over the reasons of marital discords reaching to courts and filing of false cases etc. and thought crossed my mind that may be this growing trend of match-making through matrimonial websites is a contributor to the problem. I mean think about it, most people go to these websites because they don't have a love-relationship or have not been able to find a "desirable" and "better" match via the traditional concept of match-making (common relatives etc. suggesting matches).

Don't get me wrong. Arranged marriages done through any sort of match-making may fail and love marriages fail too. But there are some inherent pros in both love-marriages and traditionally arranged marriages which are totally missing in these matrimonial websites-based marriages. In love marriages, well, there is love/romance to begin with and a somewhat understanding of each other. In typical arranged-marriages, there is respect for elderly and some common mediator who has some sort of say to family members of both sides in case of marital discords.

Matrimonial sites, on the other hand, connect people across a vast distance so not much time is spent dating (if any) before parents are made involved (in most cases parents make the profile) and then people proceed after matching and agreeing on the basics. In India, people try to copy west by using these matchmaking websites and fail in doing so since HARDLY ANY TIME IS SPENT IN DATING or forming a relationship and due to connecting with people from unknown territories a fare background check on family is hardly done as well. All in all, it is the worst form of match-making as you neither get the initial love for each other or privilege of having common mediators who may fix the problem in early stages itself. If there is any thing, there are egos of families on both sides which hardly know each other and have not incentive for not taking marital discords to courts.

And the matchmaking websites, well, they don't have any ethical impressibility forget legal or any other kind. All in all, pretty rough deal for both parties IMO.

What is your opinion?

Vishal
------------------
I'm creating an unscientific poll. Please select how your match was made.


Tue Aug 07, 2012 8:59 pm
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Joined: Sat Sep 03, 2011 4:06 pm
Posts: 483
Mine was through website. I casted my vote.

I strongly agree with the viewpoint of Mr. Vishal.fighter. After a small discord in matrimonial relationship, the two sides, unknown to each other, do not spare anything to ruin each other by these type of gender biased laws.

Even the girls having bad intentions before marriage, find an easy task to search for a bakra.

Lets caste our votes & see how much are the victims of websites.


Wed Aug 08, 2012 4:05 am
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Joined: Tue Jul 24, 2012 1:13 pm
Posts: 37
Agree..having had first hand experience..and knowing of many such cases around.


Fri Aug 10, 2012 11:12 am
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Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2008 10:10 pm
Posts: 229
From the results it seems like we have an argument for "Matrimonial Sites" should be banned


Mon Aug 13, 2012 1:51 am
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Joined: Mon Apr 30, 2012 11:18 am
Posts: 1483
I too got sucked into marriage by matrimonial website...

now saddled with 2 FIRs on 498a after 8 yrs of marriage.


Tue Aug 14, 2012 6:32 pm
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Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2008 10:10 pm
Posts: 229
This is all the more reason why we should seriously upload info about our (or our close relatives who are suffering) 498a wives into database that is publicly searchable. "Frustated", in this forum, has started an endeavor. Let's take it forward in a big way and make it big and useful.


Sun Sep 16, 2012 10:27 pm
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Joined: Tue Apr 13, 2010 8:38 am
Posts: 1987
Request the Moderator to generalize the topic otherwise he should not have allowed the option of relating through the friend/relative int the poll.


Mine was an arranged marriage. The mediator was none other than her co-mother (relation comes to her mother's sister) through our relative in their colony.


Mon Sep 17, 2012 8:54 am
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Joined: Sun Jan 25, 2009 3:55 pm
Posts: 204
Mine was by Matrimonial Website suffering still


Sun Sep 30, 2012 8:30 pm
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Joined: Sun Dec 25, 2011 3:27 am
Posts: 120
mine too


Mon Oct 01, 2012 8:33 am
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Joined: Sat Jan 19, 2013 6:07 pm
Posts: 115
mine too throgh matrimonial website. most of the marriages fail who found there partners on matrimonial websites.


Fri May 31, 2013 4:37 am
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Joined: Tue Oct 02, 2012 7:15 pm
Posts: 475
Location: Delhi
If a marriage has to fail the reasons are many and one reason could be "us" also.
No point in trying to bring back the water which has already flown under the bridge.
In my case it was common friends of my dad who came with proposal. Now they are not to be seen around LOL


Fri May 31, 2013 6:21 am
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Joined: Mon Dec 24, 2012 12:11 am
Posts: 959
I beleive there is no fixed formula for a happy marriage. As far as marriage through matrimonial websites are concerned then i highly advice people not to go by it.

Reasons are as follows as per my observation on matrimony ads in newspapers and Internet.

1.)Check any profile of a girl and she will never mention any kind of bad things or weakness about her.
(My View : A bitch never commits her mistakes as she will show you a live telecast some day about her 69 position with BF..Surpriseeeeee!)

2.)Divorced women placing ads on matrimony websites always blame that their previous inlaws tortured her and hence the marriage broke but real story is always opposite.
(My View : If a women was truly tortured then she will never search for her next groom on Matrimony Website and will mostly go by her parents wishes)

3.)Some shameful girls will upfrontly say that if you want to marry me then make sure you have a house in your name.
(My View : IrBM is coming hence 50% fixed before marriage itself else DV ka RTR clause toh hai already)

4.)Many girls will shamelessly say that her new partner should be in a government job only.
(My View : Govt. Job sabko pyaara hota hai hence naukri chali na jaye isliye settlement karne mein easy rahega)

5.)Many women place their ads saying my new parner should respect my mother/father always.
(My View : Kutta and joru ka gulam banane ki full tayarri pehle se ho rahi hai sir)

6.)Shameless womens also say that they are not willing to work after marriage.
(My View : Ghar ko lodge jaisa use karegi aur tumhaare paise se condom bhi kharidegi aur phir inlaws ko pareshaan bhi toh karna hai ghar mein reh ke)

7.)Many Womens claim that they are very friendly and that she gets mixed up with people very easily.
(My View : Apna experience bata rahi hai pichle marriages ka and saali itni acchi hain to matrimony pe kyu jhak maraa rahi hai)

8.)Some women say that they are ready to marry a divorcee guy even if he has a kid as it doesnt matters much.
(My View : It doesnt matters as settlement ka paisa toh husband deta hain bachha nahi)

9.)Some women claims that they are okay if their partner drinks alcohol.
(My View : She is actually telling that she is compromising and that even you have to compromise on her secret things. God knows what all)

10.)Last but not the least. Many women claim that she is ready to survive in any condition and be it joint family or seperate.
(My View : She means to say that koi bhi ho sasural mein sabki bajaa dalungi)

Will update more f**king reasons given by 498a bitches before marriage...

Regards,
Phasgaya73


Fri May 31, 2013 9:06 am
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Joined: Mon Apr 30, 2012 11:18 am
Posts: 1483
Pg Bhai, onemore...

Lets get married without any open celebration.. this way i will continue to get maintenance from previous husband


Fri May 31, 2013 9:21 am
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Joined: Mon Dec 24, 2012 12:11 am
Posts: 959


Fri May 31, 2013 9:25 am
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